they say you don't know what you got 'til it's gone / / they say that your darkest hour comes before your dawn

Thursday, September 23, 2010

Decisions, Decisions;

For the past four years, I've gone shopping every Thursday. While I'm busy at work, I write down a list of things I need as they come to me during the day. I get everything I need for that weekend and the rest of the week until the next Thursday. Usually I write boring things like this:
- new ballet flats.
- new jeans.
- more tea.
- bobbin pins.
- kitten food.
You get the picture.

Today was a first.
- new job.

As of Wednesday next week, I won't have a job. Kind of sucks butt, but it's almost something that I've needed. For a while I've had some serious trouble with my depression, mostly crying myself to sleep at night for no apparent reason. Maybe this break, this change forced upon me, is what I need. I've been waiting this whole time for an opportunity to do something I've really wanted to do, and now it seems I've been given what I wanted. Now I just have to figure out what to do with myself.
Maybe I want to go back and study. Maybe I want to do some soul searching.

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