they say you don't know what you got 'til it's gone / / they say that your darkest hour comes before your dawn

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Day seventeen – How you hope your future will be like;

Sure, I'd like to get married and have kids one day, but I'm not going to set up my whole life on the principle that it might happen. I'd hate to spend years of my life preparing for something that never happens. Such a shame to waste precious time. When I'm ready for that sort of thing, I'll know. Until then, I'm content living my life the way I have been all along. All I've ever wanted in life is simple - I want to be happy and in love. That's all. I don't want to fuss over the little details. As long as I'm surrounded by the people who make me happiest and feel loved, then there's nothing more I need.

I guess it's also because I'm afraid to make long term commitments with someone. Probably because I'm afraid of ending up like my parents - in a loveless marriage that ended in divorce. My parents divorce was the best thing that ever happened, but in some way it crushed my belief that forever really does exist between two people. Then again, I'm not my mother and I won't make the same decisions she did. Who knows, maybe I'll find that forever kind of stuff and live out my perfect life. I guess I won't know until it happens. If it ever does.

No comments:

Post a Comment