they say you don't know what you got 'til it's gone / / they say that your darkest hour comes before your dawn

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Slippery dip;


I've always found it interesting to see how people go from strangers to friends and whatnot. As we grow up, the method changes slightly. We become aware that similar interests aren't solely enough to sustain a friendship, and that seeing each other every day at high school doesn't mean BFF. When you're a child, making friends is so much easier.

I remember, as a child, all I ever had to do was find common ground. A little something like this:
"You like painting ?"
"Yeah, do you ?"
"Yeeeeees"
/biggest grin ever.
"Let's be best friends."
"OKAY !"
Easy peasy. That was pretty much all it took to become friends with someone. If you ever had disagreements, it could easily be settled with "Sorry" and "It's okay, I forgive you." You didn't think ahead, nor did you care who else they were friends with. All that mattered was that you were their friend, and they were yours. If only we could carry that mentality onwards as we grow up.

High school becomes some bizarre social competition where no one's really sure of the rules, or how it even began, or what the prize is, but it just sort of happens. You suddenly care whether they like the same music, wear similar clothes, who they're other friends are, and what kind of social background they have. It's like, favourite colours and past times don't matter anymore. What used to decide friendships is now the very thing that denied friendships from blossoming. We don't give anyone a fair chance to make an impact. We have, what we dub, "standards" to make ourselves feel better about being judgmental.

As long as we have a standard, we can pass out any judgment we sit fit upon another and not feel a shred of guilt. It's somehow all okay if you're comparing them to the best people you know. You wouldn't want to be friends with someone your other friends disliked, now would you ? It's ridiculous and the highest hypocritical act I've witnessed. We freely judge others but feel confined when others judge us. It's a lose-lose situation if you ask me.

I wish things could be simple again. I want to be able to make friends with someone just because their favourite colours are red and purple too. I don't want to think about whether their friends will like me or not. I want to build simple and honest friendships without all the dramas. If only it were that easy. Boo.

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