they say you don't know what you got 'til it's gone / / they say that your darkest hour comes before your dawn

Thursday, November 10, 2011

/cue mushy post - and action;

I often reflect over the dramatic changes my current relationship has undergone in the past two and a half years, and only recently did I remember one of my favourite moments along the way.

One night, while trying to sleep alone in my huge bed, I rolled over, stretched out my arms across my mattress, and felt a small dip as my hands glided over the area. I immediately realised it was the rough shape of Michael's body, exactly where he lays when he's sleeping in my bed.

At that point in our relationship, we were fighting over something that is no longer an issue, and in that moment I found his spot in my bed, I realised how much I actually missed him and how pointless our fighting was. Part of him was laying right next to me, and yet he was in his own bed, far away from me. It was like my bed was telling me exactly where he should have been but wasn't because we were both too stupid to put differences aside.

That night I decided to stop trying to change things that were outside of my control. I've been happier ever since, and worry free. I'm glad I found that spot. It's no longer there since he's hardly at my house anymore, but I know it'll be back when we move in together. On those nights he'll be out working and I'll be home trying to sleep, I know I won't feel so lonely now that his spot will be there.

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